Tag Archives: Audrey Childers is a writer

Should Marriage Licenses Expire Every 5 Years? A Funny Thought… Backed by Real Stats

Every so often, a comment pops up on social media that’s so funny and so thought-provoking, it deserves its own blog post.

Recently, someone wrote:

“A marriage license should expire every 5 years so you can decide if you even wanna renew it or not.”

😂 Now, after being married for 30 years and raising three kids, I’ve earned the right to laugh and weigh in.

Because honestly… this idea is kind of brilliant — and backed by more reality than you’d think.


📊 Marriage Renewal Cycles: The DMV Meets Netflix

Let’s be real. We renew:

  • Our driver’s licenses every few years 🚗
  • Our Netflix subscriptions monthly 🍿
  • Our car insurance yearly 🚘
  • Our iPhone updates about every 12 seconds 📱

But marriage? We sign one contract in our 20s, with no upgrades, no new terms, no renegotiation — and then hope it still works 30 years later. 😅

According to the CDC’s National Vital Statistics Reports, about 43% of first marriages end within 15 years. And per the U.S. Census Bureau, the median duration of a marriage in the U.S. is 19.8 years.

Meanwhile, psychologists have identified major “relationship satisfaction shifts” at roughly the 7-year, 20-year, and 30-year marks. (Think of them as the “major OS updates” in a long-term relationship.)

👉 So yeah, a 5-year renewal system might not be the worst idea. It would be like:

“✅ Your marriage is set to expire on March 12. Would you like to renew for another 5 seasons or let this series gracefully end?”
🤣


📝 The Real Talk Beneath the Humor

While this idea is funny, it also highlights something serious: relationships do evolve, and the people inside them do change.

A structured “check-in” — whether legal or emotional — could give couples space to reflect, grow, or even amicably part ways, instead of waiting until something breaks beyond repair.

It’s not about replacing commitment with casualness. It’s about updating the contract to reflect reality — something businesses, software, and governments do all the time.


⚠️ Disclaimer

This blog is written with humor and social commentary in mind. It’s not legal advice, relationship therapy, or an official policy recommendation. Statistics and references are provided for context and accuracy. If you’re navigating relationship challenges, please consult a qualified professional or counselor.


📚 References & Resources

  • CDC National Vital Statistics Reports: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/nvss/
  • U.S. Census Bureau, Current Population Survey — Marriage Duration Data: https://www.census.gov
  • Journal of Marriage and Family — Relationship satisfaction timelines and “seven-year itch” research
  • Pew Research Center — Marriage trends and divorce rates over time

✍️ About the Author

Audrey Childers is a writer, researcher, and storyteller who loves mixing humor with hard truths. With decades of lived experience, a sharp investigative mind, and a soft spot for a good meme, she explores the intersections of history, society, and human behavior. When she’s not writing, you’ll probably find her sipping coffee, laughing at internet comments, or questioning why we renew car tags more often than we check in on our relationships.

✨🕯️ Banish the Bad Vibes: A Cleansing Spell to Break Negative Contacts (Plus 4 More You’ll Love)

Because sometimes, a bubble bath and a little intention can shift your entire energy field.


Discover a simple yet powerful ritual bath spell to break negative contacts, plus 4 more cleansing rituals to restore your energy, release attachments, and invite light back into your life.


🌿 The Night the Energy Felt Heavy

It was one of those evenings where the air felt thick—like the room itself was carrying someone else’s mood. I had just come home from a draining conversation that left my chest tight, my thoughts tangled. Even after the person was gone, their energy wasn’t.

I drew a hot bath. The sound of water filled the silence like a steady heartbeat. On the counter sat a small bowl of pink salts, a scoop of baking soda, and the intention that tonight…I’d let go.

As I held my right hand over the mixture, I closed my eyes and pictured a stream of white light pouring down through my palm, infusing the salts with warmth. The moment I poured them into the water, the room seemed to hum. Steam rose like a veil. I stepped in.

“As this water washes over me, I break contact with all negativity.”

I whispered it once, then again. By the third time, the heaviness had begun to loosen its grip.

🛁 Spell to Break Negative Contacts

Ingredients:

  • 1 hot bath
  • 1 cup Epsom or Dead Sea salts
  • 1 cup baking soda

Instructions:

  1. Hold your right hand over the salts and visualize purifying white light flowing into them.
  2. Pour the salts and baking soda into your bath and swirl them clockwise.
  3. Step into the bath and, as you pour water over your body, repeat aloud: “As this water washes over me, I break contact with all negativity.”
  4. Close your eyes. See yourself surrounded by a glowing white light, dissolving cords, attachments, or stagnant energy.
  5. When you’re done, drain the water and imagine everything you released swirling away down the drain.

🌿 Why this works: Ritual bathing is one of the oldest spiritual practices—used in Babylon, Ancient Greece, and Indigenous cultures—to symbolically cleanse the spirit and body. Salt neutralizes energy, while water carries it away.


🪄 4 More Cleansing Spells to Restore Your Energy

1. 🕯️ The Black Candle Burn

  • Light a black candle (symbol of banishing) and place it on a fireproof plate.
  • Write the name or situation you want to release on a small piece of paper.
  • Fold it away from you three times, place it under the candle, and let the wax drip over it as you say: “What was tied is now released. What was heavy is now light.”
  • Let the candle burn safely down. Dispose of the paper outside or bury it.

📝 Why it works: Black candles are traditionally used to absorb and neutralize negativity, making this spell a favorite for energy workers.


2. 🌬️ The Cord Cutting Visualization

  • Sit quietly. Picture a cord of energy connecting you to the person or situation.
  • Visualize holding a golden pair of scissors.
  • With love and clarity, cut the cord, watching both ends retract and heal with light.
  • Say: “I release you with love. I reclaim my energy now.”

Why it works: This method is rooted in modern energy healing but mirrors ancient symbolic “severing” rituals used across cultures to break unhealthy attachments.


3. 🍃 The Herbal Sweep

  • Bundle cleansing herbs like rosemary, lavender, sage, or cedar with a natural string.
  • Sweep the bundle gently over your body from head to toe while repeating: “With this sweep, I clear and release what does not serve me.”
  • Hang the herbs to dry outside afterward to release the absorbed energy.

🌿 Why it works: Herbal cleansing is an ancient European, Indigenous, and Mediterranean practice believed to bind and absorb negative influences.


4. 🧂 The Doorway Salt Line

  • Sprinkle a thin line of salt across doorways and windowsills while saying: “Only peace may enter here. Only love may remain.”
  • Leave overnight, then sweep up and discard outside.

🧂 Why it works: Salt has been used in folk magic, Shinto, and Mediterranean traditions to create protective barriers against negative energies and spirits.


🌐 References & Inspirations

  • Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells by Judika Illes
  • Cunningham’s Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs
  • Historical bathing rituals in Babylon & Ancient Greece – World History Encyclopedia
  • Romani & Mediterranean folk cleansing traditions
  • Modern energy healing practices and cord-cutting visualizations

⚠️ Disclaimer

This article is intended for spiritual, cultural, and personal development purposes only. It is not medical advice. If you’re experiencing emotional or mental distress, please consult a qualified healthcare or mental health professional.


✍️ About the Author – Audrey Childers

Audrey Childers is a writer, spiritual researcher, and storyteller who blends ancient wisdom with modern life. She explores history, ritual, and personal empowerment through her books and blogs—always with a touch of magic and truth.


📸 Image Suggestions

  • A soft-lit bathroom with Epsom salts and candles (Unsplash/Pexels)
  • A black candle burning in a quiet room
  • Herbal bundles tied with twine on a rustic table
  • A symbolic image of white light surrounding a person in meditation
  • Vintage illustrations of ritual baths or salt cleansing (public domain)


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