Tag Archives: personal-growth

The Brighter You Shine, the Longer the Shadows: A Christmas Reflection for the Misfits, the Fighters, and the Ones Who Refuse to Dim

By A.L. Childers — the author who learned to glow anyway.



❄️ A Christmas Tale for Anyone Who Learned to Glow the Hard Way

It is a truth universally whispered—usually behind gloved hands at holiday gatherings—that the more a woman shines, the more shadows she casts.

Charles Dickens might have said it differently, of course. He’d lace it with soot, candle smoke, and the quiet scraping of ghosts past. But I, A.L. Childers, have lived enough winters to tell you plainly:

Light creates shadows.
And the brighter the soul, the darker the envy that gathers at its edges.

But oh… what a beautiful thing it is to shine anyway.

Imagine it: a warm Christmas streetlamp glowing against a bitter wind. The lamp doesn’t apologize for its glow. It doesn’t shrink when shadows stretch behind the feet of those who walk past. It doesn’t tremble when the snow falls harder, or when the darkness grows bolder.

It just does what it was born to do—
illuminate.

So do you.
So do I.
So does every woman who has crawled through a winter she didn’t think she’d survive.


🎄 The Shadows Always Arrive Before the Blessings

I learned long ago that shadows aren’t proof of failure—
they are evidence of illumination.

Every time I wrote a book that exposed truth (The Lies We Loved: How Advertising Invented America), someone felt the sting.
Every time I cracked open pain and rebuilt myself from the ashes, someone muttered that I was “too much.”
Every time I peeled back the curtain of power structures, propaganda, and hidden histories (The Hidden Empire, The Divide Machine ), another shadow stretched its long fingers across my path.

But darling…
shadows don’t form in the dark.
They form in your light.

If you cast a long shadow, it is only because you are standing tall.


🕯️ A Dickensian Reminder: Even Scrooge Needed a Ghost to Wake Him Up

Your glow may disturb someone’s slumber.
Your growth may unsettle their comfort.
Your becoming may haunt the people who preferred you small.

But Christmas—true Christmas—is not about hiding your light so others feel less cold. It’s about warmth, rebirth, and the quiet rebellion of refusing to stay buried.

In a world that profits from silence…
in a society shaped by advertising, fear, and the stories we were told to worship…
shining is a revolutionary act.

And if your brilliance wakes a few ghosts?
Good.
Some people need haunting.


🎁 Your Light is Your Gift — Don’t Wrap It in Apology

This season, I want you to do something bold:

Shine louder.
Shine wider.
Shine without shrinking.

Be the lamp in the snow that travelers seek when they’ve lost their way.
Be the warmth in a cold world.
Be the woman who refuses to dim so that others can stay comfortable in their shadows.

And if the shadows grow longer behind you?
Smile.
You’ve earned them.


Books by A.L. Childers That Celebrate Light, Truth, and Becoming

Here are a few of mine that walk this path of illumination—with all its shadows:

The Lamp of Christmas Eve

The Lamp at the End of the Corridor: A Story of Rejection, Redirection, and Resurrection for the Misfit Soul

And many more at: amazon.com/author/alchilders


✍️ About the Author

A.L. Childers writes by candlelight and conviction, weaving truth and fiction with the same steady hand. Born in the quiet South and raised by storms, she has written over 200 books spanning history, horror, wellness, rebellion, and the ache of being human.

During the holidays, she believes in three things:
second chances, hot tea, and the unstoppable brilliance of a woman who refuses to dim.


⚖️ Disclaimer:

This blog reflects personal observations, creative storytelling, and opinion-based reflections by author A.L. Childers. It is not intended as legal, medical, or historical advice. All references to books and themes are part of the author’s published works and creative portfolio.




🌟 Surround Yourself With Greatness: The Circle That Shapes Your Life

“Surround yourself with dreamers who ignite your imagination, doers who inspire your action, believers who remind you of your strength, and thinkers who challenge your mind. But most of all, surround yourself with those who recognize the light within you—even on the days you cannot see it yourself.”

This verse isn’t just poetic—it’s a guide for how to live. The people you allow into your life either help you rise higher or weigh you down. By carefully choosing your circle, you create an environment that nourishes your growth, your confidence, and your dreams.


Why Your Circle Matters

The energy around you shapes how you think, feel, and act. If you surround yourself with negativity, doubt, or jealousy, those emotions seep into your mindset. But when you align yourself with people who uplift and believe in you, everything changes:

  • Dreamers show you that possibility is bigger than limitation.
  • Doers prove that action turns ideas into reality.
  • Believers remind you that even when life tests you, your strength is real.
  • Thinkers expand your perspective and challenge you to keep evolving.
  • The true gems are those who see your greatness before you do.

The Modern Need for Support

We live in a world filled with comparison, noise, and pressure to “measure up.” That environment can leave anyone doubting themselves. That’s why being intentional about who you let close is not a luxury—it’s a necessity.

A supportive circle can:

  • Build your self-confidence.
  • Offer perspective when you feel lost.
  • Keep you focused on your goals when distractions hit.
  • Reflect your value back to you when you’ve forgotten it.

How to Build the Right Circle

  1. Choose energy wisely. Pay attention to how you feel after time with someone—energized or drained?
  2. Invest in growth. Seek relationships where encouragement and respect go both ways.
  3. Release what no longer serves. Sometimes letting go of toxic connections is the greatest act of self-love.
  4. Be what you seek. Show others the same belief, encouragement, and respect you hope to receive.

References & Resources

  • Carnegie, Dale. How to Win Friends and Influence People
  • Brown, Brené. The Gifts of Imperfection
  • Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
  • Psychology Today: The Importance of Supportive Relationships

SEO Keywords

surround yourself with greatness, positive relationships blog, inspirational life advice, how to choose supportive friends, dreamers and doers quote, building a positive circle, uplifting community, self-growth and empowerment.


Disclaimer

This blog is for inspirational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional counseling or mental health care. If you are experiencing isolation, burnout, or emotional struggles, please reach out to a licensed professional.


About the Author

A.L. Childers is a writer, storyteller, and truth-seeker who believes in the power of words to heal and inspire. Through her books, blogs, and creative projects, she encourages readers to rise above challenges, embrace their potential, and create lives filled with purpose, courage, and light.

When the Market Shakes, the Sharpest Rise: A Playbook for Entrepreneurs in Chaotic Times

Margins are tighter. Competition is fiercer. The pressure? It’s relentless.
If you’re building a business right now, you already know: this isn’t a game for the faint of heart.

But here’s the secret few talk about:
🧨 In every crisis, the sharpest entrepreneurs rise.

Yes, even in chaos.
Especially in chaos.

In the middle of economic uncertainty and shifting algorithms, it’s not about waiting for better timing — it’s about becoming better within the timing.

This isn’t about fluffy motivation. It’s about practical, proven frameworks that build unshakable brands, multiply your sales, and keep your mindset bulletproof.


🔥 Step 1: Discomfort Is a Prerequisite, Not a Problem

The most unstoppable people don’t avoid pain — they build calluses over it. They lean into discomfort, using grit as fuel. Whether you’re bootstrapping a brand or launching your next offer, success requires endurance. Physical, mental, and emotional stamina.

ACTION: Schedule one daily habit that challenges you. Something that hurts a little. It’s training for the market storms.


💼 Step 2: Start Small, Scale Smart

There are people who turned $1,000 into multi-million dollar businesses — not because they had everything figured out, but because they didn’t wait. They moved. They learned while doing. Smart growth isn’t about perfection — it’s about consistency and courageous experimentation.

ACTION: Revisit your offer. Does it solve a specific, painful problem? If not, tweak it until it does.


🧠 Step 3: Your Mindset Is the Strategy

If you’re stuck in survival mode, your business will stay there too. The people who rise in crisis use setbacks as fuel. They don’t just bounce back — they bounce higher.

ACTION: Write your “comeback story” as if it’s already happened. Frame your current challenges as setup, not setback.


💰 Step 4: Move Like Smart Money

Recession? Uncertainty? The smartest business leaders don’t freeze — they reposition. They diversify. They double down on profitable sectors and cut emotional spending. In hard times, they don’t spend less, they spend smarter.

ACTION: Review your monthly expenses. Which tools, subscriptions, or services aren’t bringing ROI? Eliminate or replace them.


📣 Step 5: Dominate Attention — or Disappear

In 2025, attention is currency. If you’re not in the conversation, you’re invisible. The noise is louder, yes — but that just means your message needs to be sharper. Be real. Be bold. Be everywhere your audience is.

ACTION: Create one high-value piece of content this week — blog, podcast, video, email — and repurpose it across platforms.


This Isn’t the End. It’s the Start of Your Ascent.

What if the chaos you’re living through is actually your training ground?
What if your future customers are waiting for you to stop overthinking and show up?

You’re not alone. And you don’t have to figure it all out by morning.

Start here.
Start now.
Start with what’s real — and build from there.


👩‍💼 About the Author

A.L. Childers is a truth-bomb-dropping business author, wellness advocate, and founder of The Freckled Oracle™ and Southern Signature Group™. With years of experience helping professionals pivot from burnout to breakthrough, she now writes empowering guides, blogs, and books that blend strategy with soul. Her motto? “Big Boss Energy — with Southern Reliability.”

📚 Books by A.L. Childers:

  • The Agent’s Arsenal: 100 Powerful Rebuttals to Help Clients and Close Deals
  • The Quantum Leap: Habits That Reshape Your Reality
  • The Freckled Oracle’s Guide to Boss Energy
    Find them all on Amazon or at TheHypothyroidismChick.com.

⚠️ Disclaimer

This blog is for educational and motivational purposes only. Always consult financial or legal professionals before making major business decisions.


📚 Resources & Further Reading

Me in 2025: Realizing I Have No One Left to Cut Off (Because I Did the Work Early)

Ah, the annual tradition of “New Year, New Me” is upon us again—complete with vision boards, juice cleanses, and the ever-popular cutting people off who no longer serve your purpose declaration.

Except this year… I sat down with my iced matcha, opened my notes app, and realized…
I have no one left to cut off.

Not a single drama magnet. Not a one-sided friendship. Not even that coworker who always “forgets” their wallet at lunch.

Why?
Because I did the emotional spring cleaning before it was trendy. I stopped hanging out with people I didn’t even like. I stopped entertaining folks who drained my energy faster than my phone on 1% with five apps running. I stopped sacrificing my peace to keep fake connections alive.

The Evolution of My Circle (Spoiler: It’s a Dot Now)

There was a time—maybe not that long ago—when my life was cluttered with folks who:

  • Only called when they needed something
  • Were allergic to accountability
  • Thought my kindness was a buffet they could feast on endlessly

But somewhere between journaling, shadow work, and rage-cleaning my contact list, I learned the difference between being kind and being a doormat. I realized that loyalty isn’t about length of time—it’s about mutual respect, energy exchange, and genuinely liking each other’s presence.

So if you’re reading this and wondering how I got here, let me give you the blueprint:


🔮 Step 1: Stop Forcing Vibes That Don’t Fit

If you have to mentally prepare yourself to hang out with someone… that’s a sign. Real ones give you peace, not pressure. You’re allowed to grow out of people, even the ones who’ve “been around forever.” Longevity doesn’t equal loyalty.

✂️ Step 2: Clean Out Your Emotional Closet

Just like that shirt you haven’t worn since 2011 but won’t throw out “just in case”—some relationships are clutter. If someone is using you like an emotional ATM or treating your presence like a convenience store, it’s time to hit delete. (Or at least mute.)

🛑 Step 3: Boundaries Are Self-Love, Not Rebellion

Saying “no” is a full sentence. And if they only loved you when you said yes, that wasn’t love—it was access. Protect your energy like it’s Beyoncé tickets. Limited. Valuable. Not for everyone.


👏 I’m Not Cold, I’m Cured

It’s not that I’m bitter. It’s not that I hate people (okay, maybe some). It’s just that in 2025, I finally gave myself permission to choose me—without guilt, without drama, without over-explaining to folks who were never listening anyway.

The goal now isn’t revenge or proving a point. It’s peace. It’s aligned friendships. It’s relationships that fill, not drain. And let me tell you—the silence is delicious.


🧠 Resources for Your Cut-Off Era (or Prevention Plan)

  • “Set Boundaries, Find Peace” by Nedra Glover Tawwab
    A must-read for anyone learning how to say “no” without having a full-blown anxiety spiral.
  • “The Drama of the Gifted Child” by Alice Miller
    For those of us who were taught to people-please as a form of survival. Break the cycle.
  • Therapy (yes, real therapy)
    Sites like BetterHelp or Open Path Collective offer affordable sessions for boundary-building and healing old wounds.
  • Podcasts like “The Adult Chair” or “Therapy Chat”
    Because sometimes hearing other people’s healing helps you walk through your own.

Final Thought

If your circle got smaller, don’t mourn it—celebrate it. You’re no longer available for confusion, disrespect, or lukewarm loyalty. You’re not cutting folks off out of spite—you’re cutting off access to your peace, and that’s sacred.

So here’s to the real ones. The few. The aligned. The vibe-checked.
And to you, dear reader—welcome to the soft life, where peace is protected and drama gets zero screen time.

To My Readers: A Warm Message from the Heart

As a writer, researcher, and fellow human navigating this complex world, I want to take a moment to speak directly to you—my readers. Writing is a deeply personal journey, but it’s also one of the most vulnerable acts. When I release a book, I’m sharing a piece of myself, my experiences, my research, and the truths I’ve uncovered so far. But let me be clear: I don’t claim to know it all.

This journey of discovery is just that—a journey. Each of us is on a unique path, finding meaning in our own time and way. If you’ve picked up my book and feel it doesn’t answer all your questions or align with your expectations, I ask for your understanding and encourage you to keep searching. No single book can encapsulate the vast mysteries of life or hold all the answers we seek.

Why I Write
I write to share my perspective, to spark curiosity, and to open doors to new ways of thinking. My words are not the final destination but a stepping stone—an invitation for you to explore further, question deeper, and find what resonates with your own truth.

These books will reflect where I am on my path right now. It’s a snapshot of my growth, my understanding, and my reflections at this point in time. And while it may not speak to everyone in the same way, I hope it plants a seed of thought, a question, or even a challenge that inspires you to dig deeper.

To My Critics
I’ve learned that not everyone will agree with what I write, and that’s okay. We live in a world of diverse perspectives, and healthy debate is a cornerstone of growth. But sometimes, criticism can feel harsh, even cruel. It’s one thing to disagree—it’s another to approach that disagreement with negativity and hostility.

I kindly ask that you approach my work with the same curiosity and open-mindedness that I bring to writing it. If you don’t agree, let that disagreement inspire you to find new information, challenge your assumptions, or even write your own book. Growth comes from exploration, not condemnation.

Let’s Keep Seeking Together
We’re all in this together, navigating the chaos, beauty, and complexity of life. My hope is that this book, and my writing in general, serves as a light along the way—a reminder that we’re all searching, all learning, and all evolving.

If you feel something is missing in my book, let that absence be a spark. Seek out new voices, dive into the unknown, and keep asking the tough questions. Growth is not about finding all the answers; it’s about having the courage to keep searching.

Gratitude for the Journey
To those who have supported my work, thank you. Every book you purchase, every kind of review, and every encouraging word fuels my passion and allows me to continue writing. You are the reason I can keep pursuing this dream, and I am endlessly grateful.

To those who feel compelled to criticize, I appreciate your honesty. But I ask for grace as we all walk this path together. Writing is my way of contributing to the greater conversation, and I hope you’ll engage with it constructively, with curiosity and respect.

Let’s remember: we’re all human, all searching for meaning, and all on different timelines. My book may not provide everything you’re looking for, but it’s my sincere hope that it offers something—a question, a spark, a moment of clarity.

With love, encouragement, and gratitude,
A.L. Childers

The Calling You Can’t Ignore: The Truth Waiting Beneath the Surface

The Calling You Can’t Ignore: The Truth Waiting Beneath the Surface

By A.L. Childers, Author of The Seven Trials of the Soul

There are two kinds of people in this world.

The first will accept what they are told without question. They will live by the rules given to them, follow the well-worn paths, and believe that life is only what they can see, touch, and measure. They will never ask why.

The second? They cannot help but question.

They feel the undercurrent beneath the surface of existence—the quiet pulse of something more. They look at life and know, instinctively, that there are secrets hidden in plain sight. They search for meaning in their struggles, lessons in their hardships, and purpose in their pain.

They do not blindly accept. They seek to remember.

And if you are still reading, then you are one of them.


You Were Never Meant to Stay Asleep

Most people will never question their reality. They will follow the systems built around them, conforming to a world that demands compliance over curiosity. They will dismiss their own instincts, silencing the voice inside that whispers, Something isn’t right. Keep searching.

But some souls cannot be silenced.

Some of us know that the greatest truths are not written in textbooks or preached from pulpits. They are hidden in the trials we endure, in the quiet moments when the world stops making sense, in the questions no one wants us to ask.

You have already felt it, haven’t you?

That sense that life is testing you, shaping you, preparing you for something greater.

It is.

But most never recognize the trials for what they are. They think their suffering is random, their struggles meaningless. They do not see that hidden beneath their hardships is an invitation.

The invitation to awaken. To transform. To remember.


A Book That Will Not Give You Answers—But Will Show You How to Find Them

📖 The Seven Trials of the Soul is not just another book about personal growth.

It is the key to the questions you’ve always been asking.

It will not tell you what to believe. Instead, it will guide you through the hidden patterns that have shaped the greatest minds, the deepest thinkers, and the most powerful seekers in history.

🔹 Have you ever felt like your challenges were trying to teach you something—but you didn’t know what?
🔹 Have you sensed that your struggles are part of a bigger journey, one you don’t yet fully understand?
🔹 Have you ever wondered if your greatest trials are not obstacles—but initiations?

Then you are already on the path.

This book will help you see the journey you’ve been walking all along. It will reveal the trials you have already faced, the lessons you were never taught to recognize, and the transformation that is waiting for you—if you are willing to embrace it.


Are You Ready to Remember?

Most will never ask these questions.

Most will remain in the illusion that life is nothing more than random events and meaningless suffering.

But some of us know better.

Some of us can feel the pulse of something older than history, deeper than words, truer than anything we’ve been taught.

And if you are one of us—if you refuse to take the easy path, if you feel the call of something more—then The Seven Trials of the Soul is waiting for you.

🔥 Get your copy today. The answers have been waiting.


Disclaimer:

The insights and teachings within The Seven Trials of the Soul are meant for personal reflection, spiritual exploration, and self-discovery. This book does not offer medical, psychological, or legal advice, nor does it claim to provide absolute truths.

Every reader’s journey is unique, and transformation is deeply personal. The concepts explored in this book are intended to inspire curiosity, deeper inquiry, and an openness to new perspectives.

By engaging with this work, you acknowledge that true wisdom is not something given—it is something sought, earned, and lived.

🔹 The path is yours. The wisdom is waiting. Will you take the next step? 🔹

The Book You Were Meant to Find: Unlocking the Hidden Journey of Your Soul

The Book You Were Meant to Find: Unlocking the Hidden Journey of Your Soul

By A.L. Childers, Author of The Seven Trials of the Soul

There are books that entertain. There are books that inform. And then there are books that change you.

Somewhere in the quiet spaces between your thoughts, you have felt it—the question that lingers, the whisper that will not be silenced. Is there more to this life than what I see?

The world tells you that struggle is random. That hardship is unfair. That pain is something to be avoided at all costs.

But what if that isn’t true?

What if every challenge, every loss, every moment of doubt was not happening to you, but for you?

What if life itself is a test, a journey designed to awaken something deep within you—something ancient, something powerful, something that has been waiting for you to remember?


The Hidden Path Few Dare to Walk

There is a reason why certain stories have survived for thousands of years.

Legends of heroes who endure unimaginable trials, only to emerge transformed. Tales of wisdom hidden in riddles, waiting for the right soul to unlock their meaning.

These are not just stories. They are echoes of something real.

Every civilization, every sacred text, every seeker of truth has spoken of a path—a series of tests that shape the soul, refine the spirit, and separate those who are content with illusion from those who seek something greater.

Most never recognize the trials for what they are. They see struggle as failure, suffering as punishment, and setbacks as signs that they have lost their way.

But the great minds who walked before us knew better.

They understood that the moments that break us are also the moments that build us. That hidden within every hardship is an invitation—to rise, to awaken, to see the world as it truly is.

And now, that invitation is yours.


A Book That Reveals the Truth You’ve Always Known

📖 The Seven Trials of the Soul is not just another book on self-discovery.

It is a key—a guide to recognizing the trials that have already been shaping you, preparing you, leading you to a truth that has been buried beneath the noise of modern life.

🔹 Have you ever felt like certain lessons in your life keep repeating?
🔹 Have you sensed that your struggles hold a meaning you can’t quite grasp?
🔹 Have you ever looked at the world and felt that something deeper is at work—something just beyond reach?

Then you are already walking the path.

This book will not give you easy answers. It will not tell you what to believe.

Instead, it will reveal the patterns, the lessons, the hidden wisdom that has been woven into your life all along.

If you have ever felt like there is something you were meant to understand—something you just haven’t quite found yet—then this is the book that will show you where to look.


This Is Your Moment

Most people will never ask the deeper questions. They will move through life, chasing comfort, avoiding difficulty, never realizing that their greatest struggles were the doorway to something greater.

But you are not most people.

You are here, now, reading these words, because something inside of you knows.

Because you have felt the call.

Because you are ready.

🔥 Get your copy of The Seven Trials of the Soul today. The answers have been waiting for you.


Disclaimer:

The insights and teachings within The Seven Trials of the Soul are meant to inspire personal growth, deep reflection, and self-discovery. This book does not offer medical, psychological, or legal advice, nor does it claim to provide absolute truths.

Each reader’s journey is unique, and the concepts explored in this book are intended to encourage exploration, curiosity, and an openness to transformation.

By engaging with this work, you acknowledge that true wisdom is found not in blind acceptance, but in your own experience, your own questions, and your own journey.

🔹 The path is waiting. Will you take the next step? 🔹

When Your Job’s Hanging by a Thread: Navigating the Dread of Being Fired with Grace and Grit By A.L. Childers

“Life is like insurance—sometimes unpredictable, but always better with a good policy and a great sense of humor.”

Let’s talk about something that most of us have felt but rarely discuss: the sinking dread of knowing your job might be slipping through your fingers. Whether it’s a whisper in the breakroom, a sudden focus on quotas, or the dreaded “restructuring,” the signs are there, and they’re hard to ignore.

If you’re feeling this way, you’re not alone—and you’re not powerless. Just like insurance, navigating life’s unpredictability requires preparation, adaptability, and sometimes, a little laughter. Let’s explore how you can face the challenge of potential job loss with grace, grit, and yes, even a sense of humor.


The Storm Before the Calm: Recognizing the Signs

Losing a job doesn’t usually happen out of the blue. Here are some common warning signs:

  • Sudden Changes in Quotas: Unrealistic targets with no clear guidance.
  • Decreased Communication: Managers become tight-lipped, avoiding clear answers.
  • Increased Micromanagement: A shift from trust to scrutiny can signal trouble.
  • Whispers of Restructuring: Even rumors can hold a kernel of truth.

Recognizing these signs early gives you the chance to take control of your narrative before it’s too late.


How to Navigate the Uncertainty

When the writing’s on the wall, it’s natural to feel fear or frustration. But here’s the secret: every challenge is an opportunity in disguise. Here’s how you can turn this situation around:

1. Keep Your Cool (and Your Smile)

Reacting emotionally might feel cathartic, but it won’t help. Instead, take a deep breath, put on your professional face, and remember: how you handle tough moments defines your character.

2. Document Your Wins

Start building a case for your value. Compile a list of your achievements, backed by data. These can help you defend your role—or land your next one.

3. Explore Career Growth Options

This might be the perfect time to invest in yourself. Take online courses, attend industry seminars, or even explore new career paths. Upskilling can transform uncertainty into opportunity.

4. Strengthen Your Network

Leverage platforms like LinkedIn to reconnect with old colleagues, attend industry events, or join professional groups. The broader your network, the easier it will be to land on your feet.

5. Find the Humor

Let’s be honest—sometimes all you can do is laugh. Maybe you’ve called the same client so many times they start greeting you like an old friend. Find joy in these moments; they’ll remind you that this too shall pass.


Turning Setbacks into Success

Personally, I’ve faced moments of professional uncertainty, and they’ve taught me that every closed door is an opportunity to open a better one. Once, when I was certain the end was near, I reached out to an old colleague who helped me pivot into a more fulfilling role. The lesson? Your story doesn’t end here.


References and Resources

If you’re navigating job uncertainty, here are a few resources to guide and inspire you:

  • Books by A.L. Childers:
    • The Affordable Care Act Agent: Your Guide to Accessing Affordable Healthcare
    • Silent Chains: Breaking Free from Conformity and Injustice
    • The Hidden Empire: A Journey Through Millennia of Oligarchic Rule
    • Pillaged and Poisoned: America’s Health in Crisis

Find all my books on Amazon.


Disclaimer

This blog is for informational and motivational purposes only. It reflects personal opinions and experiences and is not intended to replace professional advice. For specific career or financial advice, consult a qualified expert.


Final Thoughts: Your Insurance for Life’s Ups and Downs

Your career is like an insurance policy—it might feel unpredictable, but with preparation, resilience, and a sense of humor, you can weather any storm. So, whether you’re fighting to keep your current role or preparing to transition to something new, trust in your ability to adapt and thrive.

Warm regards,
A.L. Childers
Author, Advocate, and Optimist


Let’s Connect!

“Remember: when life feels like a mess, humor is the best cleanup crew!”

Good Girls Finish Last: Lessons in Love, Loss, and Self-Worth

We’ve all heard the saying: “Good girls finish last.” It’s a phrase that stings with truth for anyone who’s given their all to a relationship, only to feel undervalued and overlooked. Queen Naija’s heartfelt song “Good Girls Finish Last” resonates deeply with those who’ve tried to love someone who couldn’t reciprocate.

But this isn’t just a story about heartbreak—it’s a lesson in self-worth, boundaries, and the strength it takes to let go. Let’s dive into the empowering truths behind this anthem and what it teaches us about reclaiming our power.


1. Love Can’t Fix Everything
“No matter what I change, it’s clear I could never change your mind.”
How many of us have fallen into the trap of believing that if we love harder, give more, or change who we are, it will somehow make the other person see our worth?

The truth is, love alone can’t heal a relationship where respect, commitment, and effort are one-sided. You can’t convince someone to choose you—it’s a choice they have to make willingly.


2. Walking Away is an Act of Courage
“I know it’s gonna hurt for a while when you’re not here, but it’ll hurt me more to stay.”
Staying in a relationship where your needs are unmet often feels easier than facing the pain of leaving. But Queen Naija reminds us that the greater pain comes from staying in a space where you’re undervalued.

Walking away doesn’t mean you’ve failed; it means you’ve chosen yourself. It’s a brave declaration that your peace, joy, and self-worth matter more than someone’s inability to commit.


3. You Are Already Enough
“Have you ever felt like it all wasn’t good enough, and now you’re tired of trying to prove your love?”
For generations, women have been told to endure, to compromise, to prove their love through sacrifice. But at what cost?

The idea that you’re not “good enough” isn’t a reflection of your worth; it’s a reflection of someone else’s inability to see it. You don’t need to prove your value to anyone who can’t appreciate it.


4. “Fed Up” is a Turning Point
The line “Let me hear you say, ‘Fed up!’” isn’t just a lyric—it’s a rallying cry. Being fed up isn’t about bitterness; it’s about boundaries. It’s the moment you decide that you deserve more than half-hearted love and empty promises.

When you’re fed up, you’re ready to reclaim your narrative. You’re no longer waiting for someone else to define your happiness.


5. Their Realization Doesn’t Define You
“Maybe you’ll know once I’m gone.”
Sometimes, it takes losing you for someone to realize your value—but by then, it might be too late. Here’s the thing: their awakening isn’t your responsibility.

Your worth isn’t defined by their regret. It’s defined by your ability to stand tall, love yourself, and move forward.


A Message for the Good Girls
Queen Naija’s “Good Girls Finish Last” isn’t just a song—it’s a reminder that heartbreak can lead to empowerment. It’s okay to cry, to grieve, and to feel the weight of what you’ve lost. But it’s also okay to walk away, to demand better, and to choose yourself.

If you’ve ever felt like you’ve given everything only to be left empty, know this: you are not alone. You are worthy of a love that matches your energy, your kindness, and your strength.


Closing Thoughts
Sometimes, finishing “last” is the start of a new race—one where you set the rules, prioritize your peace, and embrace the love you deserve.

Let this be your reminder: you’re not finishing last. You’re starting fresh.

Have you been through a similar journey? Let me know in the comments—I’d love to hear your story. And if you’re ready for more inspiration, stay tuned for my upcoming book, Good Girls Finish First: Lessons in Love, Loss, and Finding Yourself.

Breaking Social Norms: Why It’s Okay to Question Everything You’ve Been Taught

We live in a world built on systems and traditions—rules passed down, often unquestioned, through generations. From the way we think about education, religion, and government to the subtle “shoulds” and “should nots” of our daily lives, these norms quietly shape who we are and how we see the world. But what happens when we stop, take a step back, and ask, Why?

For many, questioning societal norms feels taboo, even dangerous. After all, these systems are the foundation of our culture, our history, and often, our identities. Yet, history is filled with individuals who dared to challenge the status quo—people who asked bold questions and, in doing so, changed the world.

The Power of Asking “Why?”

From childhood, we’re taught to trust authority and accept traditions. While this may seem harmless, it can sometimes prevent us from seeing the flaws in the systems around us. Why do we work ourselves to exhaustion in pursuit of success? Why is happiness often tied to material wealth? Why do we value conformity over individuality?

When we fail to question, we risk blindly accepting narratives that may not serve us—or anyone else. Think of Galileo, who dared to challenge the widely accepted belief that the Earth was the center of the universe. His defiance of “truths” didn’t just reshape science; it reshaped humanity’s understanding of its place in the cosmos.

Now, I’m not saying you need to challenge the laws of physics (unless that’s your passion!). But questioning the everyday norms that dictate your life can lead to profound personal growth and even societal change.

The Fear of Breaking Free

One of the reasons many of us hesitate to question what we’ve been taught is fear: fear of rejection, fear of being wrong, or fear of losing the safety net of certainty. These fears are valid—breaking away from the crowd is never easy.

But here’s the thing: the world’s most revolutionary ideas often come from those brave enough to stand alone. Social progress, scientific breakthroughs, and personal growth all begin with someone willing to say, “What if we’ve got it wrong?”

How to Start Questioning Norms

If you’re ready to step outside the box and begin questioning the norms that have shaped your life, here are a few steps to get started:

  1. Examine Your Beliefs: Make a list of beliefs you’ve held onto since childhood. Ask yourself why you believe them and whether they still serve you.
  2. Do Your Research: If something doesn’t sit right with you—whether it’s a cultural tradition, a societal rule, or even a personal habit—explore its origins. Knowledge is the most powerful tool for change.
  3. Embrace Discomfort: Questioning norms may lead to uncomfortable truths. That’s okay. Growth often requires stepping into the unknown.
  4. Engage in Dialogue: Talk to people with differing perspectives. This isn’t about debate; it’s about understanding the vast spectrum of human experience.
  5. Act on Your Insights: Once you’ve identified a norm that no longer aligns with your values, take steps to live differently.

The Reward of Breaking Norms

When you question what you’ve been taught, you open the door to freedom—freedom to live authentically, to align your actions with your values, and to contribute meaningfully to the world. This isn’t about rebellion for rebellion’s sake; it’s about building a life and a society rooted in truth, not tradition.

In the words of George Bernard Shaw, “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”

Dare to be unreasonable. Question everything. The answers you find might just change your life—and the world.

About the Author

A.L. Childers is a bestselling author known for exploring complex societal themes with warmth and insight. With a unique ability to blend humor, depth, and relatability, Childers challenges readers to think critically, live boldly, and embrace the power of self-discovery.